absolutely trash.

When I’m annoying and asking for a slap, I wasn’t being myself. But whoever that person is, is really sorry. Please forgive them. Selamat Hari Raya Idul Fitri, dear Internet Friends! Wishing you a great celebration with your loved ones =)

Everytime I start with “not much has happen” whenever I finally write again after a few weeks absence, the post always end up being too long. This time, I’ll open with “plenty” so you’d get head ups on how much this post will bore you.

Plenty has happened. I lost the remote control so I couldn’t immediately change the channel when titi kamal’s single hit was playing on TV. I hate her for making me go to bed at night wondering how she could ever claim such song as a hit.

What else… what else… I swore I had so much in mind that I wanted to share here, but then a friend called talking about her day at WERK and it totally jammed whatever system I have in my brain that controls the balance to stay sane. I feel very much envious of her just for having a job, even when it’s something I honestly wouldn’t take.

And that’s exactly what my problem is; I am too much of a hopeless romantic that I extremely believe that one should only work at the place one’s most passionate about. I sincerely don’t mean to brag about it, but I have turned down two offers from two well-known companies, one of which even has a very good reputation world wide, mainly because I am still very much hoping for an opportunity I know thousands even millions job-seekers are dreaming about. The other reason is the ridiculous amount of money I am obligated to pay if I resign from the company before a certain period of time. And by ridiculous, I mean RIDICULOUS. I could buy myself a villa in Ubud Bali with all those zeros!

And I am beginning to think that it’s a mistake; to turn down the offers, and to share the story on the internet, making it look like I am trying to emphasize on how much of a snob (and a retarded kind of it) I am. So the next time a door opens, I will enter it in a heartbeat! And if ever that dream-opportunity later on presents itself, I’d just… kill myself. In a heartbeat.

A few weeks ago were my birthday. I am usually very excited about birthdays, especially if they are my owns. But this year’s birthday presented its evil self with an achievement-panic attack. I started to get attacks from series of deep-thoughts.

And trust me you, no good comes out of over-thinking things. That’s why I find it easier to be an emo and just whine and sob about it than actually thinking of a way to kick out the misery. It’s also easier when people take you as a perky naïve blond. That way, whenever a crisis occurs, you could just step out side and go staring on shinny things that blinks like stupid, and people would just let you.

It’s also easier to have a blog. Whenever you feel like breaking someone’s heart, you could just post a good bye note on the internet! You could also make it look like you’re the little cute piggy that the big bad wolf has been picking on. Even so, the big bad wolf sincerely hopes the piggy doesn’t catch swine flu.

I don’t trash people on the internet. (Ahmad Dhani doesn’t count). I have a blog because it saves trees.

Moving along to a warmer subject, Andro sent me two gigantic cakes (see pictures of it on my flickr page) for my birthday, and also for our anniversary *big grin*. Unfortunately, both of the cake made my fridge go down because apparently they used too much of space that it actually blocked the circulation blab la bla have no idea what the repairman was talking about. And because one of them is an ice cream cake and the other one is sort of like crème brule, only with liquor in it (for real), it can’t be kept too long in open air so I cut them to big pieces and gave them away to be the neighbor’s problem. But I LOVE the surprise! It shows how he wants to stick around, even when we’re thousands of miles apart.

My poop excuse for a bestfriend, Egan, also orchestrated a surprise party at Priska’s house. We spent the night eating cake and having this lovely conversation about –be prepared, hold on to something– WERK. lol. It seems that we just can’t escape that topic even if we try our asses off. And in between the oh so lovely conversation, we did have some pretty good laughs. So thanks guys! And I also thank Dwika’s cruelness in turning my emo-raging moment into a birthday present. Lol.

My awesome dad bought me new lens, and I didn’t even ask for it and it wasn’t my birthday that day. I have been experimenting with it a little, while waiting for my parent’s plane to land, as I arrived two hours too early at the airport to pick them up. I was too worried about being trapped in a killing traffic jam (you know how Jakarta could kick the saint of you, and I was planning on being a good girl this year so Santa would actually be nice), so I thought leaving two and a half hours early would be smart thing to do.

Ah I’ll continue this later, if not ever.. Off to sleep now.

PS. My boyfriend’s a true geek and he doesn’t even know. He has been talking for hours about NASA; naming the astronauts –even the one that didn’t get to set foot on the moon because his job description was only to maintain communication with earth from inside the spaceship (I’d get grumpy if I were him), also about how they took off and came back using different methods, and he actually explained why! It reminded me of that time we were about to land at Jakarta and he managed to explain to me the exact procedure an aircraft must go through when it’s about to land. Not to mention his knowledge of the history of Java, (he can name all the tokoh perwayangan!), also names of mountains and all sorts of expeditions the human kind has been doing since ages ago –in details; what they found there, the names of the people that did the expedition what did they do once they reached the top, etc. Talk about all that reading and countless numbers of winning eleven matches…. I love that geek of mine! =)

PPS. I strongly suspect the dog carried the remote control out of my room. She has been acting weird around me lately, chasing her tail and all. You know how guilt can make you do stupid things just to make you appear so occupied that you just don’t notice there was anyone else walking into the room. That bitch. 

I’ve known this quote since sometime in junior high I guess, but a friend of mine hadjust recently shouted it on facebook and I thought, perfect! this is the just perfect sentence to describe the exact emotion I am feeling towards this one specific issue. Some of you might find this beyond cheesy, but ah well, I really feel that I can relate to this cheesiness…

I want to work there more than an electron wants to be attached to a proton!

So help me God.